Wedding Vendor Top Priority Decisions
Vendor Selection Workshop
The Top Priority Vendor Decision (3 Stages)
Articles-Exerepts
Links-associations
How-When to Complain
Suggested Reading
Digital Products
Links
References
First Top Priority Decisions
Guest List
Planning a Budget
Budget Categories
Behind the Tradition
Style
The Appointment with the Officiate
The Caterer Speaks: selections savvy
Ceremony Venue Links
The Second Level of Decisions
Rent a Tuxedo
Attendants Attire
Cinderella for a Day
The Green Wedding Gown
Bridal Registry
Reception Food-Drink Menu
Bait & Switch
Ask the Experts
Working with a Florist
Customs
Wedding Photographs
What Makes a High Quality Video
Proofreading Invitations
The Third Level of Decisions
Traditions & Superstitions
Ceremony & Reception Music
Waltzing Down the Aisle
Other Musical Suggestions
Reception Music
Selecting the Musicians
Readings
Bridesmaid Luncheon
Seating
Gifts
Wedding Vendor Selection
Order, Order (booking vendors)
Do your Homework
It Worked for Me!
7 Ripoff Tip Offs
Vendor Selection Process Workshop
Without a Deposit you have Nothing
Business 101
Guide to Hiring Wedding Professionals
Important Things you Should Know about Wedding Vendors
The Ten Laws of Selecting the Right Wedding Vendor
5 Ways to Avoid Wedding Woes
Signs that You've Hired a Bad Wedding Vendor
Contracts and Consumer Fraud
Contract
The General Vendor Contract
Firing a Vendor
Don't Forget your Manners
Baker's Contract
Cake Maker's Contract
Florist Contract
Photographer's Contract
The Photographer's and Videographer's Contract
Wedding Gown Contract
Cater's Proposal & Contract
Music Contract
How to Complain
When you Have a Complaint
Vendor Selection Workshop
Developed by: Theresa L. Moss
The following supplies and equipment are suggested before beginning your vendor selection process:
Fax machine, scanner, copier, printer, desktop computer, telephone with speaker phone and hold button, pager, cellular phone, answering machine, answering service, email account, 800# and a p.o box.
The first step would be to review the wedding vendor/suppliers on your local Better Business Bureau site. The reliability reports should be clear of customer complaints. In the event the vendor/supplier is not a member of the BBB, request, 3-5 references and carefully review each, before considering them.
Be aware of reference contacts who call you first.
While researching reliability reports be aware of the ‘bait and switch’. You point and click ABC Flowers and DEF Auto appears, this is something that may also happen after you retain the services of a vendor/supplier. Make sure this is specified in the contract, who will be performing the services.
Also the status of reliability reports can change quickly, therefore its essential that you act quickly after reviewing positive BBB documents.
For Phase 2 of the vendor selection process, a form should be structured for the availability of each vendor/supplier, and should include if the establishment will ‘pencil in’ your event dates/times without paying a deposit. If they will allow you to be penciled in until you complete your research, great, but you may be informed that being penciled in, is not a guarantee. In other words if a customer pays a deposit and wants to schedule on your date/time well….
The notes you should be taking should include who you spoke with/confirmed the event with and you should ask to speak directly with the owner/manager. The dates and times you should want to confirm include (if applicable) your ceremony date/time, reception date/time, rehearsal date/time, rehearsal dinner
Date/time, interview date/time, tasting date/time and also if applicable, schedule vendors/suppliers 2 months before the event to do a walk through, at the ceremony and reception site.
Forwarding a confirmation letter to each vendor/supplier would be ideal, and lets not forget to promptly contact and cancel the pencil in confirmation if you decide to retain the services of another vendor/supplier. Remember if something goes wrong, you may need to recontact the vendor/supplier, so do the right thing in a timely fashion, so that they will accept your call and possibly fill your need.
Phase 3 The following documentation copies should be requested:
Contract
Vendor-supplier license
Insurance
Workers Insurance
Certification
Drivers License
References (clients)
References (subcontractors)
Industry references
No vendor-supplier should be retained or scheduled until the documents requested have been reviewed and references contacted.
Phase 4 The preinterview questionnaires, a series of questions which enable the planner to review all the documents beforehand, thus giving the client an opportunity to compare one establishment with another and make an educated decision.
Now there are several efficient ways to pass, request and review documents. Fax or email the questionnaire, which can then be completed-filled out and returned along with the document copies. It’s very important to try an complete this entire process within a 5 day period.
This process can be extremely time consuming and it would be advisable to delegate various steps.
As an added note don’t expect to find a wide selection in every category, depending where you live you may not have a variety of vendors-suppliers to choose from, it’s just that simple. Unless of course you want to retain the services of a vendor-supplier with a history of complaints.
However, as I mentioned earlier establishments not listed as BBB members, just request they forward 3-5 references.
The Top-Priority Decisions
Your initial decisions will be based on the following
The Guest List
The Budget
The Date: time of year, day of the week, and time of day
The Style of your wedding (formal vs. informal; religious vs. civil)
The availability of your wedding officiant
The Locations for both the ceremony and the reception
The Guest List
Four lists are combined in sending out wedding invitations. The bride and the bridegroom each make a list of their own friends, in addition to the list of the bride's family and that of the groom's family.
The bride's mother discusses with the groom, or if possible with his mother, how the list is to be divided between them. If the families are old friends and live in the same community,the invitations should be divided more or less equally between them. At least half of the names on the two lists would undoubtedly be the same, and therefore each family would be able to add several more in place of those which are duplicated. But if they have never known each other well, and their friends are unknown to each other, each list would have to be limited to half the total.
On the other hand, if the groom's family live in another place and not more than a few will be able to come, the bride's mother will be able to invite as many people as will result in the total number of spaces available. Both mothers may risk being a little overliberal because there are always a few who, having accepted, are then prevented for one reason or another from coming.
When some refusals are received, the bride's mother may send out additional invitations to replace those guests, up until two and a half weeks before the wedding.
It is most important for future harmony that the family of the out of town groom estimate realistically the number of guests who will make the trip to the wedding. When the bride's mother tells them the total number that can be invited and how many acceptances she expects on her side, they should make every effort to stay within the total. It is up to the out of town family to respect the requests of the bride's family in this matter, as they may not be aware of the limitations of space or expense that are factors in the number of invitations to be sent.
Planning a Budget
A carefully prepared budget, based upon what you and your parents can afford, will spare you the nightmare of impractical plans that must be constantly changed--or unnecessary debts. Whether you are planning an elaborate wedding with 300 guests or a simple ceremony with 30 friends present in your own home, a realistic budget will help you make your preparations more smoothly and happily.
A budget for a large wedding should include your allotments for each of the expenses listed on the next page. The budget for a simple wedding should include the items that you cannot provide yourself and intend to purchase, and also the way in which you will take care of other requirements. For example:
Photographs---Uncle John will take them for us as his wedding gift.
Wedding cake-----Aunt Doris baking it as her gift.
With imagination and good planning, a beautiful wedding can be held within any limits. Whatever you plan, keep to your budget, or the worrry and insecurity will get your marriage off to a bad start.
Costs for large formal weddings can range from tens of thousands of dollars to just a few thousand dollars, depending on the number of guests, the elaborateness of the wedding, and local costs and customs. This table shows the items that must be budgeted for. Amounts are not included since they change so rapidly. When making up your budget, put down what you think you can allow and adjust the figures as you get estimates from the professionals involved.
The best way to plan is to begin with your fixed costs, such as the minister's or rabbi's and organist's fees, gifts for your attendants, postage, wedding rings, etc.
Subtract that total from your available funds and see what amount you have to work with. This will give you a guide as to how much you have left for variable costs, such as limousines, a photographer, and the rehearsal dinner and reception.
Budget Categories
Bride's gown
Bride's accessories
Invitations/enclosures
Announcements
Postage
Flowers for ceremony
Flowers for reception
Bride's bouquet
Flowers for bride's attendants
Corsages
Boutonnieres
Organist's fee
Cantor/vocalist/instrumentalist fee
Music for reception
Sexton's /facility fee
Minister or rabbi's fee
Limousines for bridal party
Photographer
Videographer
Bride's gifts for attendants
Groom's gifts for attendants
Bride's ring
Groom's ring
Marriage License
Accommodations for bride's attendants
Accommodations for groom's attendants
Rehearsal dinner (per person cost)
Bridesmaids' luncheon
Bachelor's dinner
Reception expenses (per person cost)
Wedding cake
Behind the Tradition
A Proper Time to Marry
There's an old folk saying that goes "Choose not alone a proper mate, but a proper time to marry." If you don't need to contemplate practical considerations as part of choosing the month you will marry, there are folklore, myth, and tradition to guide you!
The Victorians loved attributing meaning to everything, and many paid close attention to the wedding rhymes that suggested certain results from certain wedding dates.
January---Marry when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind, and true.
February---When February birds do mate, you wed nor dread your fate.
March---If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know.
April----Marry in April if you can, joy for maiden and for man.
May-----Marry in the month of May, you will surely rue the day.
June----Marry when June roses grow and over land and see you'll go.
July---Those who in July do wed must labor for their daily bread.
August----Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see.
September---Marry in September's shine so that your life is rich and fine.
October---If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry.
November----If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember!
December---When December's snows fall fast, marry, and your love will last.
Style
Now is the time to start thinking about the color scheme of the wedding. Your wedding color choices are often influenced by the time of year, seasonal flowers, the bridesmaids' dresses, the locale, and personal preferences.
Ultimately, however, the most important choice you have to make in deciding the style of your wedding is how formal or informal you wish it to be. There are three categories of weddings---formal, semiformal, and informal.
The formality is related to the location of the ceremony and reception, the size of the wedding party, the number of guests, and the time of day. While the style of a wedding in a church or synagogue may be formal or informal, a home wedding generally lends itself to informality, unless, of course, the home happens to be a mansion. In that case drag out the white gloves and candelabra! The variations on each style are endless, but there are a few basic differences in the three categories. Formal, Semiformal and Informal
The Appointment with the Officiate
Source: Book of Modern Manners Charlotte Ford
You should set your meeting with your officiate well in advance of the wedding to explain the kind of ceremony you have in mind, and possible, to avail yourself of the advice of an expert. Kathleen and John, who were to be married by a priest in a nondenominational chapel, originally thought they’d have a simple service with only the traditional vows. After they discussed their plans with the priest, their ceremony came to include elements of the new wedding: friends were asked to speak, and John and Kathleen wrote their own wedding vows, all of which lent an air of community and informality to their wedding, something which both of them had wanted but were hard put to achieve without suggestions from their officiate.
A clergyman may also want to discuss marriage with you. Many believe that brief counseling before marriage saves many couples from counseling later on. The clergyman will also want to discuss any religious problems peculiar to your marriage, for instance, Ann, who is Jewish, and David who is Catholic, were to be married in a Unitarian church which Ann had attended on a few occasions as a child. Neither Ann nor David had strong religious convictions, but they wanted a church wedding. They felt that a nonsectarian service would be meaningful to them and would also reflect their personal religious views, which were not bound by specific doctrine. When the couple spoke with the clergyman before their marriage, he initiated a discussion of the kinds of problems involved in a mixed marriage. He was informative and supportive. When the time came to discuss the ceremony, he told them what he had planned, a simple ceremony including quotations from Shakespeare and a discussion of the family of man, and asked them to feel free to comment or to request changes. Ann and David thought the service quite personal and responsive to their views.
If you do not speak with the officiate beforehand, you’ll be leaving the wedding ceremony to chance. One couple did not speak with the rabbi who was to officiate at their wedding, because the bride had known him since childhood and therefore assumed he would have something meaningful to say at her wedding. Instead of talking about the bride when she was ten, saying a few personal words appropriate to the couple, the rabbi gave a sermon on truth and righteousness, which seemed clearly to be his standard marriage sermon. It had nothing to do with the spirit of this wedding or the two people getting married. The service was impersonal and formal, not at all the tone the couple was trying to set for their wedding.
In another instance, the couple met the officiate only minutes before the ceremony was to begin. During the service, he spoke of the Spanish groom as coming from Argentina. In the hurry and confusion, the officiate had mixed his information, and he embarrassed the bride and groom as well as the congregation.
The Wedding Team
The Caterer Speaks: Selection Savvy
To many couples, finding the right reception site tops the list of first big decisions. Here are some tips to consider when looking for that all-important place.
Think about how much work you and your family actually want to do. Keep in mind that hotels and private clubs are experienced in handling large parties and can do much of the organizing for you. Reception halls with in house caterers may cost more but may be worth it, considering the ease of service. Locations that offer everything under one roof--ceremony and reception area, food, decor, flowers, you name it---make planning a wedding for busy couples with a short engagement time a snap. The minutes can be the lack of choices and ways to personalize the wedding.
Sites that are bare will require more attention, in terms of food, drink, decor, help, and hookups. Everything will have to be sourced out to different vendors, and someone (you?) will be responsible for coordinating their efforts.
A wedding at a rental facility or historical site, such as a botanical garden or mansion, may require less decorating work but may also require that you use the facility's in house catering staff and often in house baker for the wedding cake.
If you're considering a reception at home or at a site where a tent will be used, remember that everything---from the lighting to the flooring to decorations---will have to be delivered and assembled and disassembled once the party's over. It can be costly to transform a tent into a ballroom.
If the idea of a destination wedding appeals to you, remember that few friends and relatives will be able to take the time off to get there and afford the additional costs. If the cost proves prohibitive for many guests, you might think about being married with the few close relatives and friends who can make the trip in attendance and than having a reception when you return home from the honeymoon.
Hints
Before committing yourself, make sure you check on these items and if they are not provided, see what the availability and cost will be through a rental company.
Hotel facilities are available to everyone, but popular hotels tend to book up rapidly, especially in the traditionally busy wedding months of June, July, and August.
Private clubs are nice, but few open their facilities to non-members. If your family does not have a membership, you might have a relative or close friend who would be honored to host (not pay for) your wedding.
Ceremony Site Ideas
Association Luxury Hotels International http://www.alhi.com
Resort Hotel Association http://www.resorthotelinsurance.com
Club Managers Association of America http://www.cmaa.org
American Park & Recreation Society http://www.aprs.org
American Public Gardens Association http://www.aabga.org
Association of Art Museum Curators http://www.artcurators.org
Outdoor Amusement Business Association http://www.oaba.org 800-517-OABA
International Association of Amusement Parks and Attractions http://www.iaapa.org
American Association of Museums http://www.aam-us.org
Historical http://www.tps.cr.nps.gov/nhl
National Park Service http://www.nps.gov
California Beaches: 888-869-7569-619-221-8901
Winery 951-676-8231 800-472-2377
Botanical Gardens http://www.aabga.org
San Diego Association of Yacht Clubs http://www.sdayc.org
American Zoo and Aquarium Association http://www.bismarck-art.org
The Second Level of Decisions
Once you have settled the who, where and when of your wedding, it is time to start shopping, interviewing, and booking vendors, suppliers, and services. Because each of these next steps generally requires a good amount of advanced time, there is no time like the present to start:
Shop for and make decisions about clothing and accessories---for the bride, groom, and attendants.
Visit stores and list gifts you wish to receive with bridal registries
Begin reviewing reception menus
Interview and listen to bands or DJs, or start listing songs you would put on tapes for the reception.
Interview and talk to florists
Interview and look at the portfolio of photographers and videographers.
Order invitations, enclosures, announcements, and other printed material.
Rent a Tuxedo
Check the phone book for tuxedo rental shops in your area. When renting for wedding attendants, look for stores with multiple locations or stores that will fit a tux based on measurements--this helps ensure a consistent look.
Visit your chosen store four to eight weeks prior to the event to have your measurements taken. Good sales associates measure around your chest (both including and excluding the width of your arms); your naked waist at belt height; your hip girth, including your seat; your neck circumference; and your sleeve length from the center of your back.
Consider cuts that complement your build and accommodate the formality of the occasion. In contrast to the rule for business suits, double-breasted tux jackets and those with wider lapels look great on a broad chested, heavier-set man. A cropped jacket will elongate the height of a shorter man.
Prepare to pay between $100 and $150, excluding tax, for a rental that includes pants, jacket, shirt, tie, cummerbund, shirt buttons, cufflinks, socks and shoes. Prices vary depending on the cut and make of the tux and on whether you want a vest, a special necktie, or fancier cufflinks and buttons. You usually leave a deposit when you have your measurements taken, and pay the balance before leaving with tux in hand.
Schedule a final fitting one-week before the event. The rental price includes alterations--you may need a lift in the sleeve or a tuck in the waist to be dancing through the wee hours comfortably and in style.
Pay attention when the sales associate explains how to get dressed in a tux. You may find you're all thumbs with the special buttons, cufflinks, cummerbund and tie if you do not understand how to put them together.
Plan to return your tuxedo the day after your event, although some stores may give you a few additional days. You are seldom required to dry-clean the rental, but damages and excessively late returns will add to your final bill.
Tips
Rent from establishments that offer in-store inventory. Should you have any last-minute changes or additional needs, they can offer you an alternative.
A white bowtie and cummerbund paired with a coat and tails is the most formal choice, but a black bow tie and cummerbund are acceptable at any formal event.
Warnings
If you're coordinating tuxedo rentals as the best man, don't expect your groomsmen to remember all the dates and details about their rentals. It's a good idea to confirm that they've hit all the deadlines for measurement submission and have made appointments for fittings.
If the store you're using doesn't have multiple locations, encourage out of town members of your wedding party to have measurements taken professionally at a tuxedo-rental store or tailor shop near them, then send the figures on to the store providing all the tuxes. Self-measurements can be very inaccurate.
Attendants Attire
The bride and groom choose the outfits of their wedding attendants. They should choose something suited to the formality (or lack of it) of the occasion and to the looks of their attendants. In a very small wedding, a bride may tell her one attendant simply to go buy a pretty dress of her choosing, but in weddings with more than one attendant, the clothes are usually coordinated and selected by the bride. The bride should try to select some style that is flattering to all her attendants. The attendants pay for their dresses and any accessories, such as gloves, hats and shoes, so needless to say, the considerate bride keeps price in mind as she shops, and if her parents can afford to do so, they may pay for the bridesmaids’ outfits.
The bridesmaids dress identically, except they may wear different shades of a color. The maid of honor usually, but not always, is distinguished from the others by wearing a different color or different dress, and/or carrying different flowers.
The dresses should compliment the bridal gown, that is, they should be of similar material and design. An all-white wedding can be stunning, but it does detract, in the eyes of some, from the bride.
The bride should send color swatches to her bridesmaids as soon as possible so they can order shoes dyed to match. She may suggest jewelry she would like her attendants to wear, and she may even give, as bridesmaids’ presents, lockets or earrings that she wants them to wear on the wedding day.
Cinderella for a Day
Source: The Complete Idiot’s Guide to The Perfect Wedding Teddy Lenderman
It’s not a wise move to order your gown from a shop advertising that it’s going out of business. If you can buy the gown off the rack, that’s fine. But don’t put down a deposit and allow the store to order the gown.
One bride I worked with learned the lesson the hard way. The shop called and said that the gown was in. When the bride went to get the gown, the shop had “lost” the gown and couldn’t reorder. What really happened was that the shop had sold that gown to another customer for more money?
Before you begin your shopping, ask yourself the following
What gown might flatter you the most?
What style of gown will help set the mood or theme of the wedding?
How formal will the wedding be?
What time of year are you getting married?
Do you feel comfortable with the bridal salon and its staff?
How important is comfort to you?
This one you really need to think about once you have a few gowns to choose from.
The Green Wedding Gown
The choices you make in clothes for this day may not seem to have much of an impact on the environment. Actually, they do. The manufacturer of clothing is a many-level process. You can choose beautiful clothes in a way that will not contribute to air pollution, water pollution or soil degradation, or will reduce those effects significantly.
If the traditional, full-length wedding gown is something you cannot do without, there are greener alternatives.
Borrow or rent a gown.
The heirloom-wedding gown. If it is a delicate vintage cotton fabric, see if the cleaners can simply launder and press it gently.
Purchase a secondhand gown from a consignment shot, antique shop, or thrift shop.
Have a gown made with washable fabric, or make it yourself, if you or a family member are accomplished at sewing.
Instead of a wear it only once veil, consider wearing your hair “up”, with flowers or a hat you will wear again.
Purchase a dress that can be worn again, and made of fabric that can be laundered at home.
Purchase a secondhand outfit that you can wear again that might not otherwise be considered for a wedding.
Make (or have made) a wear again dress.
Bridal Registry
Register for Wedding Gifts
Make it easy for yourself and your guests-be organized and offer them a wide selection in both price and types of gifts.
Tips
Keep the registry active for at least a year after the wedding guests have a year to buy their gift and remain within the bounds of etiquette.
Avoid including registry information in your wedding invitations or other wedding mail that comes directly from you. Your guests can learn where you’ve registered by asking your parents or your wedding party.
Keep track of who sent what as soon as gifts arrive. This will help you later on when you are writing thank-you notes.
Double-check the stores’ return deadlines and policies.
Steps
Discuss what you truly want as a couple, and draw up a wish list.
Explore your options. You can go the traditional route-home accessories, formal place settings, silverware and fancy linens or you can break the mold and sign up for tools, contributions toward a trip or a special purchase such as a home, or donations to a selected charity.
Scout around, visit a number of stores until you find one that suits your personal taste and satisfies your needs.
Consider registering at two or three stores, a good option if you and your betrothed want to cover more ground or you simply can’t agree on a single registry theme.
Set up a registry soon after your engagement, but not more than nine months prior to the wedding day.
Give as much detail as possible when filling out the registry form-make the experience easier on guests by providing information about brand, pattern or model, size and color.
Find out whether the store or chain has a computer database for tracking; whether it takes phone, fax or online orders; whether it offers direct shipping; and what kind of refund and exchange policy it has.
Ask the store for a complete list of what you’ve registered for, so you can verify that your list and your mailing address have been entered accurately in the store’s database.
Jot down the name of a contact person at the store so you’ll know whom to contact should complications arise.
Reception Food and Drink-Menu
Once your have located a reception space that meets all your needs, it is time to brainstorm with vendors on the specific type of menu and services you want. In choosing the menu for your reception, don't forget to keep your guests in mind. You will want a menu to please most everyone, but you don't have to settle for bland or boring.
Your main objective is to have a festive occasion, while making your guests feel comfortable. You don't want to alienate your reception guests, presumable the people who mean the most to you, by forcing a quirky, trendy, or bizarrely alien menu on them. But you can find foods that will excite your guests, that perfectly fit the season and the setting---and choices that are a meaningful expression of your personality. Be creative in choosing your menu---but never at the expense of your guests.
Pitfall!
Bait and Switch with Bands and Disc Jockeys
“My fiancé and I saw this great band perform at a friend’s wedding so we hired them for ours. At our reception, different musicians showed up and it just didn’t sound the same”.
This is perhaps the #1 problem brides and grooms have with their reception entertainment. We’ve known some agents and bandleaders who play “musical chairs” with backing musicians- sometimes known as “pick-up bands”. Here a group of musicians are thrown together at the last moment…and the lack of rehearsal shows. You might hire a certain “name brand” band but then the bandleader substitutes some different (and possibly inferior) musicians at your reception. Hence, you don’t get what you paid for, that is quality entertainment.
Large DJ companies with several crews are also guilty of this tactic. You can prevent this deceptive practice by specifying in a written contract the exact musicians/DJ you want at your wedding. Stay away from agents, bandleaders or DJ companies who won’t give you a straight answer.
Ask the Experts
Source: I’m Getting Married Now What? Andrea Rotondo Hospidor
We’re on a tight budget but want the music at our church ceremony to be special.
Chances are, your church works with an organist who will be happy to be the “musical director” of your event. Talk with him about your preferences. If you can’t afford a professional vocalist, ask someone in the church choir if he or she is interested in taking part in your wedding. Another way to find musicians is to call a local music college. You may be able to find an existing string trio or singer who would be thrilled to sing at your event at a discounted rate. Don’t forget to contact the American Federation of Musicians
(www.afm.org, 212-245-4802), which can put you in contact with professional musicians in your area. But before you select anyone; be sure to hear them play!
Working with a Florist
Choosing arrangements for multiple spaces, plus bouquets and boutonnieres, can be overwhelming
or a bed of roses. What you need to know when consulting with a floral expert:
Bring those photos and printouts of flowers that you’ve been saving for your first meeting. Discuss not just your floral budget (be honest about it) but how you want to focus those dollars-for example, simple bouquets but elaborate centerpieces.
Give your florists time to digest your ideas and work up a written proposal, describing each arrangement and the costs.
Your actual flowers will be very close to, but not exact duplicates of, any sample arrangements ( expect to be charged for these); availability varies from week to week based on the season and weather.
Ask your florist if she can handle other wedding-planning duties. Some will coordinate a variety of décor elements like linens, tableware, lighting, and even furniture and tent rentals.
Your florist will expect a deposit; in turn, you should get a contract that includes the flowers to be used (plus acceptable and unacceptable substitutes), delivery details like time and place, the name of the person responsible for on-site setup and knockdown, backup contacts, and cancellation and refund policies.
Customs
The bride and her maids once carried bouquets of strong smelling herbs (such as chives or garlic) to ward off evil spirits. Later, sweet smelling flowers became popular, and certain ones were felt to have symbolic meanings. Even today, the lily represents purity, a rose means beauty, orange blossoms represent fertility, and ivy is meant for good luck.
Wedding Photographs
The formal photographs of bride and groom, attendants and parents are taken after the receiving line at the reception or may be taken several hours before the ceremony. Candid photos are taken throughout the reception and during the processional and the recessional or the ceremony as well. You might decide on a professional photographer. Another fine alternative is to hire a photo-reportage photographer from your local paper.
Asking a dear friend who is also an amateur photographer may well save money, but there is no guarantee that even one photograph of this, “one of the most important days in your life”, will be realized.
One couple thought their photographic problems were solved because half a dozen guests all volunteered to take photographs. Most of the photographs were charming, but the guests with the cameras didn’t know who was who in the cast. Therefore most of the photos were of guests who were essentially the extras and not the supporting cast. It’s best therefore to hire a professional who will ask first who’s who and has developed an eye for what is important at such an event.
What Makes a High-Quality Video
These are a few things to look for when viewing a sample tape of a videographer you're considering.
All the equipment used must be the most up to date, high-quality, professional video equipment, including the editing and dubbing machine.
Experienced videographers will look for spontaneous and natural reactions to record, while maintaining a formal approach to the ceremony.
The segments of events in the video should tell a story, detailing the way the events occurred on your wedding day.
Look for good, steady use of the camera, clear sound, good color and a sharp picture.
Notice how the shots are framed. Does the image fill the frame nicely, without having certain things cut out, like the bride's headpiece?
Notice the editing techniques used. Do they use a seamless electronic method of editing? Does the video look smooth as it moves from one scene to the next?
Proofreading-Invitations
It’s important to carefully examine your invitations for errors. Ideally, your printer will present you with a sample several weeks before they are finished. Whatever the case, examine them carefully before you take them home. Here are a few items to watch for:
Is this the right color paper?
Does it have the correct weight and texture?
Are they properly printed, or out of alignment?
Is it the style you ordered?
Is the wording exactly as you requested?
Are the lines in the proper places?
Is it the correct weekday, date and year?
Is the time correct? Is it written out in words (not numbers)?
Are honour and favour spelled with a ‘u’? (They should be).
Are the ceremony and reception sites correct?
Are the addresses correct?
Are all the names spelled correctly?
Are commas and apostrophes in the right places?
Do the enclosure cards have the correct information?
Do they match the rest of the stationery?
Do response cared envelopes have the correct address?
The Third Level of Decisions
With all your outside resources in order, you now can turn your attention to the details that will make your wedding day personal and unique. You might do the following:
Listen to and choose music for your ceremony
Select readings for your ceremony
Make lists of music choices for your reception
Plan special events you want to include, such as your first dance at the reception, a bouquet toss, or a party for your attendants.
Select gifts for your attendants, perhaps parents, and each other
Begin to chart seating arrangements for your reception
Incorporate family and cultural traditions into your wedding
Traditions and Superstitions
Society for the Study of Myth and Tradition
656 Broadway
New York, New York 10012
212-505-6200
Ceremony-Reception Music
Before making any definite music arrangements or selections, you should check with your church or synagogue to see what restrictions it may have. Today there is a wonderful variety of music. Combinations of instruments are available such as harps and violins. You are not limited to only a soloist or organist.
The music should start about a half hour before the ceremony, usually instrumentals to set the mood, with a solo sung just after the mother of the bride is seated. This lets people know the processional is about to start. The processional will begin usually with an instrumental, sometimes a solo, which has a good regular beat to walk to. Once the attendants have reached the altar, music which announces the bride is played, commanding everyone’s attention as you walk down the aisle. This selection can be traditional or contemporary and either an instrumental or a solo. One or two songs may be played during the ceremony-any more would be too many. Finally there is the recessional, which should be more upbeat and slightly quicker tempo.
Waltzing Down the Aisle
First of all, the music for your wedding ceremony needs the approval of the church or the officiate performing the service. Always check with the ceremony site before you make plans. Most places welcome all types of musical instruments, but some are very strict. What do you and your groom like in music? Is an organ what you had in mind, or would you prefer something like a harp or a guitar? There are all kinds of ways to make music a fun and meaningful part of your wedding ceremony.
For your ceremony typical instruments and vocal includes the following
Organ
Piano
Violin
String quartet
Flute
Harp
Trumpet
Small chamber orchestra
Choir
Soloist
Duet
Other musical suggestions include the following
A choir adds a nice touch for the wedding service. One couple who were both members of a professional choir hired the group to sing several songs during the prelude, but college or high school choirs will do as well. Perhaps a donation to their scholarship fund will be all that’s needed to book them.
Singing to each other. Couples (you have to be really comfortable with this idea) have sung to each other as part of the ceremony. Don’t try this unless you are certain you can accomplish this task and have the talent to carry it off. (You might want to ask a friend for an objective opinion.)
Reception Music
Reception music can be any of a variety of types, depending on the mood you want set at that particular time. You may want something a little softer for the first hour during the receiving line or cocktails, and then have the tempo pick up as the evening goes on. Or maybe you prefer only violins, with no dancing. The types of musicians may range from an individual like a pianist, to a small combo of mixed instruments, to a larger orchestra of 8 to 20 people.
Don’t forget the ages of your guests; try to select musicians that can play a variety of songs from slower traditional, to 50’s and rock and roll, to faster contemporary music for dancing. It’s a good idea to make a list of songs you would like played and give it to the bandleader. Try to have a good mix of fast and slow songs. I’m sure the bandleader will be able to help you arrange and select appropriate songs, if needed. Also go over with him the timing of important announcements, such as the grand entrance, the first dance, cutting the cake, and throwing the bouquet and garter.
Selecting the Musicians
Selecting your musicians and music carefully is important. It can add or detract from the success of your wedding and reception.
You may find musicians by asking friends or relatives, caterers, wedding consultants, your clergyman, or through the yellow pages or musicians’ union in your area. If the reception is held in a hotel or restaurant, the manager may be helpful with music suggestions.
Make sure to interview a few groups before making a final decision. Ask to hear them play. You may do that at one of their events, or most bands today have a video of themselves, which is helpful. Discuss the fee, how many hours they will play, and how many and how long their breaks will be and what they will wear. Check to see if they have recorded music which can be played during the breaks. Also make sure there are enough electrical outlets for their needs.
Make your musical arrangements as far in advance as possible. Give the musician a deposit to secure the date and get everything agreed upon in a written contract.
First Dance
For your first dance, select a song that is meaningful to both of you. It’s a good idea to practice dancing to it a few times before the wedding. After you’ve danced together, you and the closest male member of your family, usually your dad will share a dance, followed by your groom and his closest female relative, such as his mom. Another event that you may want to have a special musical accompaniment to is the garter toss.
Ceremony music can generally be broken down into three categories
Average total costs: Overall, couples spend about $1,000 on the average for music at the ceremony and reception. If you live in a big metro area like New York or LA, you can double or triple that figure. What inflates entertainment costs in big cities are minimums. One Chicago bride told us bands there often have an eight person minimum-that is, the bandleader insists on having eight musicians on stage. That inflates costs. The Chicago bride told us prices there are $3500 to $6500 for popular wedding bands.
Music
Music is a major part of your wedding and reception, and should be planned and selected carefully. Music helps create the atmosphere. Special sons will make the wedding uniquely your own. The music should be determined by you and your fiancé, keeping in mind the type of guests attending, the budget you have to work with, and any restrictions of the church or reception site.
Usually two different types of music are desired; softer, more romantic music sung or played during the ceremony, and entertaining or dancing music played for the reception. In some cases the same musicians may play both types. This is more common if the wedding and reception are in the same location. The alternative is to have one set of musicians or the church organist and soloist for the ceremony, and another group to play for the reception.
A DJ (Disc Jockey) is another avenue for your reception music. I’ve seen good DJ’s, and I’ve seen bad ones. Any form of music makers at your reception can make or break the party. Make sure you’ve seen a DJ’s performance and understand what he will do and what he won’t do. Read the contract carefully. Note how long he will play and how many breaks he will take. Check out whether he will need any extra electricity at the reception. Make sure he will be dressed appropriately as well.
Music can add a wonderful aspect to both your ceremony and your reception. Make wise musical choices for both situations. Your choices can frame your wedding day and set the mood for all to enjoy!
Music
For some time, a wedding just isn’t a wedding without a mirrored ball, dance floor, and a funky D.J. If that’s what your heart desires, start auditioning D.J’s now. You can ask for a video demo of their services, or try catching them live at another event. Other couples prefer live musicians, such as a jazz trio, calypso band, or small orchestra. Speak with vendors, and then compare the price quotes with your budget. To find musicians in your area, ask friends and family for recommendations, look in bridal magazines, and contact the American Federation of Musicians (www.afm.org, 212-245-4802). Or if you can’t afford professional musicians, call a local music college and ask if any of their students would like to audition for your event.
Whether choosing a D.J or a band, find out who in the band will be the Master of Ceremonies. His job is to announce the bridal party, begin the first dance, introduce any toasters and make sure the entertainment portion of the evening goes smoothly. Make sure to give him all the details of your event, including the names of everyone in the wedding party.
Most bands take a short break every hour. While at first this may seem daunting, it lets your guests take a break from the dance floor to rest and eat. You are usually required to feed the band, so add them to your head count. However, it’s perfectly fine to feed them deli sandwiches rather than the full scale reception meal. If you’re concerned about the lull in entertainment, ask the reception venue if they can pipe in background music during the breaks, or set up a CD player.
Readings
Source: I’m Getting Married Now What?! Andrea Rotondo Hospidor
The readings at your wedding will give you (and your guests) something to contemplate before the exchange of vows. These selections are meant to reinforce your religious beliefs as well as the meaning of love, loyalty, and marriage.
The readings usually take place after the opening prayer and remarks by the officiate. Someone in your bridal party can present a reading. Or you can ask a family member or friend to read it’s a lovely way to honor someone close to your heart who is not in the wedding party.
Depending on the rules of your church or synagogue, you can choose one or two readings from a holy text such as the Bible, the Book of Common Prayer, and the Torah. Poetry, literary works, and song lyrics may also be appropriate, depending on where your ceremony takes place. Remember, not all churches allow secular readings, so ask your officiate to clarify any stipulations beforehand.
Select your readings as far in advance as possible, and give your readers a photocopy. They will want to get acquainted with the text but should not feel compelled to memorize it. Note: Have the copy laminated to keep it fresh.
Dancing
When does the dancing start? At a seated dinner, dancing should not start until after dessert has been eaten. If, however the reception follows an afternoon wedding and the meal won't be served until later, guests may dance before the bridal party goes to its table. At a buffet reception, the newlyweds may start the dancing as soon as they have left the receiving line or after any group photographs have been taken.
Who dances first? The bride and groom dance the first dance, while guests watch and applaud.
Tossing the Bouquet
Traditionally, just before the couple leaves the reception, the bride or her maid of honor gathers together the bridesmaids and all single women guests, often at the foot of a stairs, in the center of the dance floor, or by the door. The bride then turns her back and over her shoulder throws her bouquet or a facsimile of it, called a "tossing bouquet," if she wants to keep and preserve her original bouquet. Tradition has it that whoever catches the bouquet---who gets to keep it, by the way---will be the next one married.
Bridesmaids' Luncheon
In many American communities the bridesmaids give the bride a farewell luncheon (or it may be a tea) in addition to the regular showers.
There is no special difference between a bridesmaids' luncheon and any other lunch party except that the table is more elaborately decorated, often in white or the bride's chosen colors for the wedding. The bride may give her bridesmaids their presents at this time, and if they are giving her a single present from all of them, this would be the occasion for the presentation.
If the bride and her attendants are working there may be a convenient time to have a luncheon. Instead, her bridesmaids may arrange for a cocktail party after work, or for a dinner in a restaurant.
The Seating
For a large dinner a U-shaped table makes an ideal arrangement. The bride and groom, the bride seated on his right, sit at the outside of the base of the U with their attendants beside them.
The best man sits beside the bride, the maid of honor beside the groom. If there are many of the bridal party, some are seated opposite the bridal couple. The bridegroom's parents---or whoever are host and hostess--sit at either end of the U. The mother of the bride is seated on the right of the groom's father, and the bride's father sits on the groom's mother's right. Other members of the party are seated along the arms of the U in whatever way seems to make for the most congenial dinner partners. Grandparents are seated near the parents, and younger people may be grouped together.
At a smaller dinner a rectangular table is best. The bride and groom sit together at the center of the one long side, their attendants beside them, the host and hostess at either end, and other guests between.
Gifts
Bridal Attendants' Gifts to Bride or Groom, or Both
After dinner coffee spoons, each engraved with the initials of one attendant Silver tray, pitcher, or picture frame engraved with attendants' names Coffee table with copper plaque engraved with attendants' initials.
From Bride to Bridesmaids
Either at the bridesmaids' luncheon shortly before the wedding or at the rehearsal dinner, the bride gives each bridesmaid her present. A typical gift is a bracelet with a monogrammed disk, a pin, or other jewelry, and according to the means of the bride, may have great value or scarcely any. The gift to her maid or matron of honor may match those given the bridesmaids or be slightly more elaborate. If it is something that can be engraved, such as a small silver picture frame, the date and the initials of the bride and groom or the bridesmaids' initials commemorate the occasion.
From Groom to Ushers
The bridegroom's gifts to his ushers are usually put at their places at the bachelor dinner---if one is held. If not, they are presented at the rehearsal dinner or just before leaving the church. Silver or gold pencils, belt buckles, key rings, wallets, billfolds, and other small and personal articles are suitable. The present to the best man is approximately the same as, or slightly handsomer than, the gifts to the ushers.
The Bride and Groom Exchange Presents
The custom of the groom giving the bride a present in addition to the wedding and engagement rings has more or less fallen out of style. If the groom does wish to give his bride a gift, he goes shopping alone and buys the handsomest piece of jewelry he can afford.
The bride need not give a present to the groom, but she sometimes does if she chooses. Her gift is something permanent and for his personal use----ranging from cuff links to a watch or ring.
Traditional Weddings
Let’s face it: There is something very comforting about tradition. Following in the footsteps of your parents, grandparents, and great grandparents can be very rewarding. If you’re the sentimental type, you may consider marrying in the church or synagogue you attended while growing up, wearing your mother’s or grandmother’s wedding gown, and hosting a reception complete with a bouquet toss.
A traditional wedding can mean many things. Generally, it signifies that your parents will play a large role in your wedding and will have some say in the guest list, inviting extended family and old family friends. A church or synagogue ceremony is common, followed by a reception at a hotel, country club, or function hall. The wedding party includes a maid of honor, several bridesmaids, a best man, and additional ushers. While a traditional wedding may seem old hat, you can personalize it to your individual taste.
Wedding Vendor Selection
Order! Order!
Do your Homework!
It Worked for Me!
7 Rip Off Tip Offs
Without a Deposit You've Got Nothing
Business 101
Guide to Hiring Wedding Professionals
Important Things You Should Know about Wedding Vendors
The Ten Laws of Selecting the Right Wedding Vendor
5 Ways to Avoid Wedding Woes
Signs that You've hired a Bad Wedding Vendor
Contracts and Consumer Fraud
Contracts
The General Vendor Contract
Firing a Vendor
Don't Forget your Manners
Bakers Contract
Cake Maker Contract
Florist Contract
Photographers Contract
Photographer/Videographer Contract
Wedding Gown Contract
Caterer's Proposal and Contract
Music Contract
How to Complain
When to Complain
Order, Order!
There's an art to the order of booking your vendors, some of which is based on the importance of the service to the wedding (that's why the officiate is way up there), some on how many weddings the vendor can handle in a day, and some on old-fashioned supply and demand. Photographers come way before florists simply because a single photographer can commit to only one wedding on a given day (although a large photography studio may have a stable of photographers), but a major florist can book several events for the same day.
Do your Homework!
Can you give me the names and numbers of your last dozen jobs? It’s not that I don’t trust you or anything.
That’s what you say.
Then, you call and see what the references say.
No references? Well, then you’re gambling.
Call the idiots up and see if they have anything left from your wedding. The video tapes, digital photos, maybe a hand drawing on a soggy napkin.
Get whatever they do have left. It may not be a DVD with a top notch program.
But, unless these idiots have something to give you, all you will end up with is what’s in your memory.
Paul Anaheim, California
"It Worked for Me!"
"You know how you get a sixth sense sometimes? We went to a photographer who really poured it on. He promised us a great package for a reasonable rate, but he seemed just a little too eager. My fiancé was ready to sign---he thought it was a great deal. But I insisted that we check him out with our local Better Business Bureau. I learned that two couples had filed complaints: they said his pictures were unsatisfactory and amateurish. There had even been a lawsuit filed against him two years ago! We told him thanks, but no thanks----and I was very gratified that I had decided to play detective."
7 Rip-Off Tip Offs
Stop right there. Put your money away. A lot of people are after your cash, and you, quite understandably, would like to hold on to as much as of it as you can. It won't be easy: Last year, Americans frittered away more than $1.2 billion on dubious deals, an average of $2,057 for every consumer, according to the Federal Trade Commission. How do you tell the bargains from the boondoggies? Here's a look at seven offers that often don't pay off, plus smart ways to save your hard earned money.
Watch for these RED FLAGS
Claims that you've won a "free" prize, or a fee to collect your "winnings" for a contest you haven't entered.
Companies that offer freebies to entice you into attending a high pressure sales presentation, where there may be more incentives. You could lose sight of just how much this "free" deal could cost you.
Promises of insider discounts, special deals, or secret information offered exclusively by firm. Often you can find better offers on your own.
Salesperson who pressures you to make an immediate financial commitment or to sign a contract you haven't read.
Contracts or forms that are hard to understand. Even minor mistakes in filling out the form may be used as an excuse to avoid honoring the agreement.
Companies that won't put their prices or promises in writing. A legitimate firm stands behind its deals and wants to give you what you need to make a smart decision.
Firms that do not provide contact information or that provide only an e-mail address or a post office box. After all, if you can locate them, authorities can too.
If you’ve BEEN HAD
Send the company a written complaint, asking for a refund. Detail the problem and include any relevant documentation. If you paid by credit card, you can dispute the charge in cases of fraud and nondelivery of a product or service. If it's a local business, consider suing in small claims court.
To help prevent others from getting scammed, contact:
Your state attorney general (naag.org). If the company that victimized you operates in another state, notify that attorney general as well. If there are many complaints against the company, an attorney general may file a suit, which could win financial judgments for consumers or put the operation out of business.
The Federal Trade Commission (ftc.gov). You'll find extensive information about common rip-offs, and scams, plus an online complaint form.
The Better Business Bureau (bbb.org). It will contact companies about consumer complaints and issue fraud alerts to the public, media, and government agencies. It also has an online complaint form.
1.Travel Discount Clubs: The Best Advice: In general, clubs that charge more than a few hundred dollars are likely to be rip-offs. Avoid going to an in-person sales pitch. "You may think, No way am I going to buy anything, but the salespeople have answers to your every objection," says Susan Grant, director of consumer protection at the Consumer Federation of America. The deal is good for only one day, or the price keeps going down if you say you can't afford it---those are hallmarks of a scam."
2. Cell Phone Replacement Insurance: The Best Advice: Skip the cell phone insurance unless you have a high end device like a Blackberry or Treo or your teens tend to lose their own expensive phones. Most insurance plans give you up to 14 days to enroll after you buy a cell phone, so take the contract home and read it carefully.
3.Mail-In Rebates: The Best Advice: Even if you do collect, a mail in rebate may not always be the best deal. Shop around to see if you can get a lower price without the hassle. Some companies, including Staples, Costco, and Rite Aid, offer paperless rebates. Just log on to the store's website to enter the required information. The advantages: You don't have to bother with proofs of purchase, you can track the status of your claim online, and you'll get your check sooner.
Watch out for rebate checks that are designed to resemble junk mail; some consumers have tossed them by accident. Companies no doubt count on that.
4.Pet Health Insurance: The Best Advice: To take the sting out of vet bills, factor the cost of routine care---about $453 a year for a dog and $363 for a cat---into your budget, along with a few hundred dollars extra for emergencies.
5.Extended Warranties: The Best Advice: Retailers profit by as much as 80 percent on these contracts. Bank the money you would have spent on an extended warranty. "Everything you own isn't going to fall apart at the same time," says Travis Ford, "but if one thing does, you're covered."
6.Rent to Own Merchandise: The Best Advice: Spending $35 to rent a big-screen TV for a Super Bowl party might be a good deal. But over the long term, rent to own contracts are like sub prime mortgages for washing machines and pullout sofas. If you miss a payment, the merchandise may be repossessed and you'll lose the money you've paid.
7.Payday Loans: The Best Advice: If you're really in a pinch, opt for a cash advance on your credit card (about 28 percent in interest, plus transaction fees). If you belong to a credit union, you can usually get up to 18 percent interest on small-unsecured loans. As an alternative to payday borrowing, the FDIC launched a pilot program in February in which 550 bank branches in 27 states will offer loans of up to $1,000 at an ARP of up to 36 percent. That's high, but it beats 500 percent.
Without a Deposit, You've Got Nothing
If there's one mistake that couples make over and over, it's in thinking that they've somehow reserved a vendor's services before they've put down a deposit. No matter how deep your personal connection during the interview, no matter that you were told the date is clear, you are not even penciled in on a vendor's calendar until you've put down a deposit. And nothing is officially reserved until you've both signed the contract. Do not assume that the vendor will contact you before accepting another event for the same date. On the contrary, if they haven't heard from you, vendors assume that you're not interested in booking them. When you wait to send in the deposit, you risk losing some of your top choices.
Business 101
Apply these basics of business to your dealings with each vendor.
Get a written estimate.
Sign a contract. If a vendor doesn't have one, write a letter stating all the terms. Both of you should sign and date it. Should you find yourself in this position, see the contract point outlined in the individual vendor chapters to find out what you need to include. Book: The Wedding Book Mindy Weiss
Read the entire contract before signing, paying special attention to deposit and cancellation terms. Make sure the contract names the person who will be at your event. You don't want to be surprised by someone you've never seen before on your wedding day.
Double check the wedding date, time, location, price, attire of the vendor's staff, and overtime fees stated in the contract.
Make sure the contract specifies exactly what the vendor will provide. It should describe any product with potential variations, such as a cake, a bouquet, or an invitation.
Check references. Ideally you should talk to couples who have hired the vendor within the last eighteen months. The vendor should be willing to give you three references. If she isn't, walk away. It's also worth a call to the Better Business Bureau to find out if any complaints have been registered against the company.
Guide to Hiring Wedding Professionals
One of the most challenging things about getting married is finding and hiring the wedding vendors. However large or small their roles may be, they will have a significant impact in the overall outcome of your wedding day. Because of this, it is imperative to take your time and follow some very simple steps to ensure you are hiring quality and reputable wedding professionals that you can trust.
As you will soon discover, there is really no shortage of wedding vendors in any given category. The goal is finding the professional that is right for you, not only with product, service and price, but with personality as well. The search for wedding day vendors can begin in a number of places. Knowing where to look and what to look for will assist you in your search. The following are suggestions as to where you may begin the search for your vendors.
Bridal Shows
The greatest value in bridal shows is the opportunity to meet with a large number of wedding vendors and view many products at one time, in one location. There are many categories of vendors represented at the shows, making it an invaluable tool for doing research and for gathering wedding-related information. When you find vendors you are particularly interested in, make a note of it and call soon after the show to book a personal one on one appointment.
Ceremony and Reception Location
The locations you select for your wedding day are quite familiar with particular vendors, and usually have a preferred vendor list. The vendors on this list have worked at that site many times before and are familiar with the logistics and rules of the location.
Friends and Family
You will usually get honest no nonsense answers and opinions regarding products and services when you ask married friends and family members (even co-workers) about their own weddings. Ask them about their vendors, the services they used, what they liked and didn’t like, would they hire them again, etc.?
The Internet is an easy access, easy to use, anytime resource. You can find a wealth of vendors on the web. Checking out a vendor’s web site can give you a good idea of pricing, packages, and type of work they do before making a personal appointment.
Local Bridal Magazines
Using local wedding magazines and directories can at first seem overwhelming, as there are a large number of advertisements in these publications. You can, however, find excellent vendors in the magazines, but it will take some calling around to acquaint yourself with these vendors.
Wedding Planners/Consultants
Wedding consultants have several pre-established relationships with local vendors. If you are working with a consultant, she should be able to provide you with preferred vendor list. However, if you are not working with a consultant, you can still benefit from this knowledge, as most consultants will share their preferred vendor list with you for a fee.
Conclusion
Once you have made your final decisions, you must get a written contract. Call the vendor to confirm the details and ask for a contract to be sent to you. A contract is the best way of ensuring you and the vendor understand what is expected, as it should outline specifics such as dates, times, names, and types of services/products provided. It will also spell out payment plans, refund and cancellation policies. It behooves you to read and understand the contract. Do not assume you have secured a vendor for your wedding day until you have a contract that is signed by you and the vendor. And finally remember, part of getting the most from a vendor’s service is also being a good client and providing the vendors with the payments and other requested information in a timely manner. Source: Michael Brito www.bridalocity.com
Important Things You Should Know about Wedding Vendors
Even in the bridal industry, there will always be shady people who might be looking to take advantage of a young couple getting married. It could be a wedding photographer who nickels and dimes for every little thing, or even a high priced wedding consultant who has dollar signs in her eyes. To avoid any misunderstandings, headaches and really bad experiences, follow these tips below and you’re wedding planning will be worry-free, for the most part.
Establish a contract; this is really a no brainer. If you are dealing with a reputable business, you will find that this is often standard procedure before engaging in any business. Remember; do not assume anything, always read the fine print and the terms and conditions. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. Do not sign anything until you fully understand what you are signing for.
It is also important to consider cancellation policies. What happens if you cancel a service you have booked? Will there be fees involved? Dear God, what if the wedding is called off? You have to be sure that there is an escape clause for extreme circumstances such as these. As much as we don’t want to think such horrid thoughts, things do happen all the time
When dealing with caterers or reception facilities find out if there are additional fees for set up and clean up. Do not be afraid to ask about charges for cake cutting, coatrooms and corkage fees. All costs should be itemized in the contract and request that no additional fees are to be added after these fees have been agreed upon.
Be sure to inquire about overtime fees. Whether this is for your reception, limousine service or any other service on the day, you do not want to be slapped upside the veil with an unexpected charge for overtime fees. Play it safe and find out what options you have if your wedding runs overtime. Nine times out of ten, they always do.
Be cautious of a deal that seems too good to be true. If you shop around, ask questions and do your homework, you should have a general idea of how much a certain service will cost. If you find an offer that is suspiciously cheap, don’t be afraid to ask why. Most likely, it’s not too good to be true; rather, the service is simply horrible.
Double bookings can sometimes happen, particularly during the peak wedding seasons. If you know that another wedding is booked for the same day in the same room as yours, be sure that you specify your exact time, from which hour to which hour you require the room. Remember to allow for enough time to clean up between weddings. Hopefully, someone on staff will manage their time effectively to avoid any awkward situations.
Where possible, it is advisable to work with a professional wedding photographer who specializes in weddings. Don’t settle for a friend’s cousin best friend who happens to shoot photography as a hobby part time. A professional photographer will have the experience to beautifully capture your wedding day in each picture taken.
Don’t be obsessive, don’t compromise, don’t forget about your budget, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Just because you are planning the most important day of your entire life, don’t get too emotional and do not be pressured by slick vendors or high-pressure sales tactics. There are enough quality wedding professionals to choose from-you do not want to regret one of these decisions later. Source: Michael Brito
The Ten Laws of Selecting the Right Wedding Vendor
Search for your wedding vendors through your friends, family members, and coworkers. Word of mouth is an old and proven way to find reliable businesses. Even if you can’t afford a wedding consultant to plan your entire wedding, it might be a good idea to consult one to find reputable wedding vendors in your area. The money you spend on an initial consultation with a wedding planner may pay for itself once you realize the cost savings.
Second Law
Never hire the first vendor you meet. Always make sure you select from at least a few different vendors. Just because you have a good first impression of a vendor, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t consider others. The more vendors you take into account the more educated you’ll become about prices and selection. You should consider at least 2 or 3 vendors for each product or service you plan on using for your wedding day.
Third Law
Get it in writing. Even if you find the vendor trustworthy, you should ALWAYS get it in writing. The documents describing the service should be as detailed as possible. Such detail might seem excessive, but it will assure that you and the vendor understand each other. If you get it in writing, the vendor might respect you more than if you only had a verbal agreement. If you get it in writing, you are also helping the vendor. If a vendor refuses to get it in writing, you should walk.
Fourth Law
Ask to see if you could speak with their previous customers. It is bad news, if a vendor doesn’t make references readily available to you. Well established businesses will likely volunteer references, so don’t hesitate to ask. Once you get the references, be sure to contact them. That’s why you’ve asked for them.
Fifth Law
When you negotiate prices, be sure to learn about hidden costs. You should have a clear understanding of what the price includes. If you are unsure, be sure to ask them to clarify.
Sixth Law
Negotiate the price. You should bargain with your wedding vendors. Don’t be embarrassed by trying to get the best price. If you can’t get them to lower their price, try to get some additional free service or product included in the negotiated price.
Seventh Law
Once you get everything in writing, you should have a wedding consultant read through it all. You might even consider an attorney looking through your contracts. Their expert eyes might help you catch a mistake or question something suspicious. Spending a few dollars might help you save a lot of money and many headaches later.
Eighth Law
Don’t sign anything until you understand the terms of the contract. If you disagree with something have it changed prior to signing. Vendors will more likely accommodate your requests prior to signing the contract.
Ninth Law
Get a receipt. Some vendors might require a deposit, and you should always require a receipt.
Tenth Law
Keep in touch with your wedding vendors. Calling them periodically doesn’t mean you are bothering them. You might get more attention and better service due to your proactive approach. If you have concerns, be sure to voice them early. Source: George Meszaros www. Sweet-reflections.com
5 Ways to Avoid Wedding Woes
Author: Rose Smith
You’ve been planning your wedding for months. You’ve met with vendors, visited locations, made some decisions, and feel that your wedding plans are finally coming together. How do you know that the people and services you are looking at booking are reputable and will actually provide what’s been promised? Here are 5 things to watch out for when dealing with the wedding industry.
Check on your vendor through the wedding associations
Some vendors appear to be oblivious to what you desire. You may end up with the wrong flowers or be short staffed at your dinner reception even though you specified how many guests will be attending. To avoid mix-ups check on your choice of vendor with the Association of Bridal Consultants, the Leading Caterers of America and the American Disc Jockey Association before signing any contracts. If the wedding professional you have chosen is not a member of any of these associations, you should definitely get some reference names and numbers of previous clients and call to see if they were satisfied with the service before booking.
Don’t Rely on another wedding professional’s recommendation.
It’s quite common to ask your wedding planner or some other industry professional for recommendations on services that you’ll need. For example, you may ask the reception manager at the hotel to recommend a cake decorator or a florist and they will be more than happy to provide you with a list of vendors. However, the problem with this is that more often than not, these referrals are based on kickbacks.
The fact is, many vendors pay a fee to be on the “preferred” list of various location venues. You need to be aware that the caterer, photographer, or whomever the location manager is recommending has most likely paid an annual fee or commission percentage to be put on the list. Unfortunately, being “on the list” does not ensure that you will get good service. Once again, you need to get personal references and do your homework on any businesses recommended by other wedding industry vendors.
Anything that has the work “Wedding” attached to it will cost you 20% to 30% more.
This is important to note once the word “wedding” is spoken out loud, the cost of any service immediately jumps. Take the time to make a few phone calls with each wedding service you are looking at. First get a price based on a wedding event, then have someone else call a day or two later to get a price based on just a party. You will probably be surprised at the difference in quotes. You could then show up at the vendor’s place of business and negotiate the lower “party” price for your wedding.
Are you paying for a slice of cake -or a thin sheet of paper?
Quotes for wedding cakes can range all over the place. Obviously, the more elaborate the cake, the higher the cost to make it and you are usually charged “by the slice”. The problem is-how large is a slice? Slice fees can range anywhere from 75 cents to $20 each, yet that $20 piece of cake could be paper thin. When ordering your wedding cake, make sure that the “slice of cake” is specified in your contract.
This brings up another question. What if you’re getting a friend or family member to make your cake? That should eliminate the “per slice” fee, shouldn’t it? Not so. The reception location will usually charge you a serving fee based on the number of slices cut and served. Once again, make sure you check up on all these extra details so you aren’t surprised with additional charges.
All the little details add up to big expenses
You have to be on the ball when booking any wedding services. Ask about every little detail, particularly what is…and is not…included within the services that you are looking at booking. For instance, at your chosen reception venue find out if all the tablecloths, cutlery, glasses and napkins are included within the price quoted or are these extra? Let’s say you’ve rented chair back covers. Did you know that there’s a good chance that you will be charged an additional fee to actually have them ironed and placed on the chairs? Another example: the staff will set the tables, but you may get dinged a service fee for the staff to place your centerpieces on each table as well.
Most couples realize the importance of looking over their contracts with a fine toothcomb to make sure everything that has been agreed upon is listed within the contract. However, how many of us actually think to look for anything not included? Its human nature to make common sense assumptions-you’re paying the rental fee for cloth napkins, therefore it’s assumed they will be nicely folded at each place setting. Will they? Or do you need to pay extra for a “folding fee”?
Be diligent in your research and take the time to get answers to clarify what things may not have been included-and therefore not mentioned by the vendor. It’s the only way to ensure that your wedding celebration doesn’t become a frustrating “surprise” event that unexpectedly blows your wedding budget sky-high.
About the Author: Rose Smith owns and operates Wedding Themes and more, a site dedicated to bringing you great theme wedding ideas, bridal advice and wedding tips. She also runs First Step Wedding Planning where you discover a variety of wedding resources to help you save money, time and energy.
Signs that you’ve hired a Bad Wedding Vendor
Travel today is as easy as swiping a credit card and getting on a plane. Thus, brides are traveling all over the United States to say their “I dos”. However, traveling is the easy part. Planning a wedding from a different city is hard enough, so how does a bride plan a wedding from a different state? If a bride doesn’t have the money for a wedding coordinator, she will have to fend for herself in the vendor world. She can search online and make phone calls, but she will still be racked with anxiety that the vendors she hires will not show up on the big day. Las Vegas is the world capital of weddings, and because of this, some brides are taken advantage of and left without an important service on her wedding day. A bride shows up to the chapel but learns that the vendor she hired to make her cake simply doesn’t exist, or the woman she hired to do her hair also hasn’t shown up. For wary brides trying to create order out of chaos, here are some bad vendor signs to watch out for:
Doesn’t supply a clear contract. The way a vendor handles the contract is the same way they will handle your wedding day. If a vendor doesn’t provide a contract at all, or gives you one that looks like a five year old wrote it, or says simply, “we don’t need one,” that should be a foreshadow of things to come. Anyone who has a legitimate wedding business should be able to provide a quality written, legible contract in a timely fashion.
Doesn’t answer your questions. If a wedding vendor seems more interested in getting paid than your wedding day, get out and get out now. Don’t expect all wedding vendors to be sensitive and caring to the point of tears, that’s what your parents are for, but do expect them to care about their service to you and your satisfaction. If they brush off your questions or make you feel belittled because you asked them, they will not care about your satisfaction on your wedding day.
Bad communications. The way vendors answer their phones and return calls and e-mails immediately shows whether a vendor is a winner or not. If you have a hard time getting a hold of them, you don’t seem to understand each other or they don’t speak your same language, get someone else. Plenty of great wedding vendors want your business and you should be patient enough to find that perfect fit like you found your perfect mate.
Isn’t willing to meet in person. If a wedding vendor isn’t willing to meet in person it can mean a few things. One, their business doesn’t exist; two, they only want your money; three, they are so booked with weddings they can’t concentrate enough on any single one. Find a vendor who has time for you and understands the importance of meeting in person.
Too inexpensive. A wedding vendor that is too inexpensive can be more poisonous to your wedding than if a wedding vendor doesn’t show up at all. This is because; usually wedding vendors who charge little show up but perform poorly or get your instructions wrong. Look for the good deal, but be careful.
These bad vendor signs are just a few out of dozens to watch for. Other signs to look for include: The vendor won’t give referrals, he or she treats you poorly, he or she has a shady location with a P.O. Box, or you start seeing hidden fees. Author: Renae C. Judkins is a wedding consultant for www.vegaswedlock.com
Contracts and Consumer Fraud
Once you’ve interviewed and narrowed down the various professionals who will be providing all the services for your wedding, it will be time to firm up the details. With each professional, get a contract or letter of agreement describing the details of merchandise or service he or she is to provide. Having a contract will give you and the service provider peace of mind as the wedding day approaches. Having the details in writing will help ensure there are no misunderstandings. Or, if something should go wrong, you have the written contract to help renegotiate the price or provide evidence in case of litigation.
Contracts
Most wedding professionals who provide goods and services will have standard contracts; if they don’t they can write the details out in a letter of agreement. The contract or agreement should include the costs, and should be signed by both parties.
Contract Tips
Write out all details. Specify all the details, from the size and type of flowers in your bouquet to the appropriate dress and number of breaks the musicians will take. The following list contains some of the general items that should be included in the contract.
Day, date and time
Delivery dates, times and locations
Detailed list of merchandise ordered
List of services to be provided, number of hours, breaks, etc.
Appropriate dress
Name of person in charge of your wedding
Alternative merchandise or service, if needed
Deposits or payment schedules
Last date to make changes or provide final guest count
Cancellation and refund policy
Read and understand the contract
Read the contract carefully, especially the fine print. Make sure you understand and agree to everything; if not, ask questions or make changes-now’s the time! Don’t overlook the refund or cancellation.
Date and sign the contract.
Make sure both parties sign and date the contract. You won’t have a valid contract if the party promising to provide the merchandise or service doesn’t sign it. This may only become an issue if something goes wrong, but then it may be too late.
Use credit cards. Put your deposit on a credit card.
Pay the smallest deposit you can, and put it on a credit card. Putting all deposits and purchases on a credit card is the best way to protect yourself as a consumer. Special federal consumer protection laws protect all payments made with credit cards. You, as a consumer, have recourse to your credit card companies if you receive merchandise or services that do not live up to those you contracted for. You must first make an effort to correct the problem with the provider, or renegotiate the terms or prices (do this in writing and keep copies). If this does not prove satisfactory, send a copy of your contract, correspondence, a letter explaining the problem, and pictures or any proof that will strengthen your case to your credit card company. If, after their investigation, they find the merchant did not live up to the terms of your contract, they will not release funds to his or her account (or will deduct them from the account) and will credit your account. If the retailer wishes to dispute this, he or she will have to file a claim against you for payment.
Avoid large cancellation fees.
Read the fine print of the contract or ask exactly what the cancellation policy is. Will the deposit be refunded if you cancel six months in advance, or if the provider is able to re-book the date with another wedding? Does the contract state that, if the wedding is canceled, you are liable for 50% of the cost or for the total cost of the wedding, even if the original deposit was for much less than that cost?
Last minute cancellation fees are understandable and fair; just beware of what you are agreeing to before signing the contract. In the event you do have to cancel, notify all services as soon as possible.
Contract
You should expect to sign a contract with every supplier, from the stationer to the florist to the limousine service to the wedding consultant. Every single detail should be covered in writing in the contract, including taxes, gratuities, dates, delivery schedules, payment plans, cancellation fees, and refund policies. Take the time to read everything thoroughly; if you don’t understand something, ask questions until you do. Never sign a contract under pressure. If you’re still unclear about some aspect of the contract, take a copy of it to a friend who has experience in contractual agreements. Be sure you are clear on how and when bills are to be paid. And make sure there are clauses in the contract that ensure proper restitution, in the event of a snafu that is clearly the vendor’s responsibility. Also, keep the following in mind:
Check for Hidden Costs
Even deciphering the fine print on a contract can leave you with unanswered questions. Know exactly what you need up front so that you can ferret out hidden, unanticipated costs. You are entitled to know exactly what is included-and what is not-before agreeing to the service. If the service provider or contractor is unwilling to give you a detailed listing or breakdown of costs, consider looking elsewhere.
For example, make sure that alterations to your gown are included in the service and price in the contract with a bridal salon. If they are not, ask what the general costs are. Does the salon charge extra to press your gown after alterations? Would it be less expensive for you to take the gown to a reputable and experience dry cleaner for pressing?
Don’t forget taxes and gratuities, which can add a significant amount to the total bill-especially in states that have a high sales tax. It’s a good idea to make sure that tax and tips are included in the total price. And inquire about such hidden costs as “plate” charges”.
The General Vendor Contract
The date including year and day of the week of your wedding and the location where the vendor will be providing services.
The time the vendor is supposed to arrive, or for deliveries the day and time items are to be delivered.
The specific names and telephone numbers of the people providing the service, not just the company name.
The name and number of the person the vendor should contact if there are any problem.
Exactly what is being paid for, such as what kind of flowers, the amount and type of hors d' oeuvres to be served, the number of waiters who will be working, and so on, including information about insurance coverage and liability. (If some of these details will be agreed upon at a later date, put that date in the contract, and make sure it's clear that the initial price quote isn't definite. Play it safe: Have the vendor give you a maximum price quote at the beginning, so there won't be any surprises later.)
How long the vendor (s) will stay at the wedding.
The agreed upon method of payment, amount of deposit, balance due, and when each installment is due. (As payments are made and costs are confirmed, this information should be added to the contract).
Any overtime fees, taxes, and gratuity requirements.
A clause detailing what happens if the vendor fails to deliver services as promised.
What happens if you, or they, postpone or cancel (or fail to show up), plus their refund policy.
Firing a Vendor
If one of the members of your team isn't working out maybe he's so far behind schedule that he's missing opportunities, or he's not in step with your vision, it could become necessary to break off the relationship. The first step is to speak calmly with the vendor to discuss your concerns and dissatisfactions. If have enough time, try to give the vendor one month to address your planning concerns. If not, explain why you don't think the relationship is working and terminate it. Do it in a business like manner--no hissy fits allowed.
Many of these vendors belong to the same professional circle and may be friends with one another, so you don't want to go ballistic and gain a reputation for being difficult. For these same reasons, you also don't want to bad mouth the vendor.
Your contract should specify the financial ramifications of firing a vendor. In some cases, you will lose your deposit, but it may be the best solution to keep your wedding on track.
Don't Forget your Manners
Say "please" and "thank you" These small courtesies go so very far.
If you don't care for a sample your florist or caterer puts together and there's still time for changes, convey your feelings without insulting them. And if there isn't, repeat the following to yourself: "Nobody will notice but me. Nobody will notice but me.
Try to find something positive to say ("the color is fabulous") before discussing what you want to change.
Pay vendors promptly.
On your wedding day, go up to the band ( and any other vendors working to make your day special) and thank them for being part of your day. Show them a little appreciation and they'll work their tails off to do a good job for you.
If someone does a great job for you, write a thank you note. You'll be glad you did.
You're relying on these vendors to make your memories. Behave badly, and you jeopardize the goodwill. Why would you risk that on such an important day?
Bakers Contract
Method of payment, amount of deposit, and when the rest is due. Most caterers ask for fifty percent of the estimated bill as a nonrefundable deposit. The balance is usually due either soon before your wedding or on the wedding day. If you're planning far in advance, however, and the cost is high, you should be able to negotiate a lower deposit. But if you're making arrangements well ahead of your wedding date, watch out for a 'price escalation' clause. Even if the catering manager quotes you a per person price for food and liquor, this clause will allow him or her to increase the price later. If such a clause appears in your contract, fight to get it deleted. You want a firm price guarantee---but should that fail, insist that any increase be subject to a maximum limit.
Time the caterer will arrive to set up the reception.
Type of meal and type of service.
Bar and beverage agreement.
The date you must finalize the menu and give them a final head count (usually about two weeks before your wedding).
The staff to guest ratio.
Who will be on hand to supervise your reception?
Extra charges not included in the price quote, such as gratuities, sales tax, and overtime charges (including what time these go into effect).
Any special arrangements, items, discounts, and so forth that you've agreed upon. For example, you should find out ahead of time about the food substitution policy. Insist that you be allowed to make the final decision about what is and is not acceptable.
The Cake Maker's Contract
The contract with the cake maker should address the following points. If he presents you with a contract that leaves any of these out, draw up a letter covering them (label it "Addendum to Contract") and gently lobby to have him sign it. Make sure he attaches the letter to his copy so that he has all of the terms in plain view.
The date, time, and location where the cake is to be delivered. Double check the information to make sure it's correct a transposed number is the kind of type that can really cost you. There is often a two hour window for delivering the cake.
There should be a sketch or photo of the cake you're ordering, along with a written description of both the interior and exterior. The description should specify the type of icing, decoration, cake, and filling and the number of people the cake is to feed.
The fee for the cake, along with deposit and final payment information, should be clearly stated, along with how much money has been received and how much is due. If there are any circumstances under which you would get a refund, those should be defined.
Anything that the cake maker is supposed to provide, such as flowers for decorating the cake or a monogram cake topper, should be documented in the contract.
Florist Contract
The agreements you reached during discussions.
A specific listing of the flowers to be used for each arrangement, with an item by item price list.
A list of mutually acceptable substitutions if the preferred flowers aren't available. This will avoid surprises and disappointment on your wedding day.
Whether you want your flowers to be tight, opened, or somewhere in between, if this concerns you. ( A good florist knows how to nurse a flower so it looks perfect on your wedding day.)
The return policy for rental items. Who picks everything up? When? If rental items aren't picked up the same day, you may have a problem with your reception site.
And ask if you'll be charged if there is a delay in returning an item (if, say, a guest takes home a vase filled with flowers and it takes a little time to get it back.)
If changes are made along the way, write them down yourself and send the list to your florist, or make sure your florist puts them in writing. Make sure that any changes are added to your agreement.
The Florist Contract
When interviewing a florist and working on details in the contract, make sure you cover these points:
Establish who will find out about any restrictions at the venue in terms of decor and candles.
Find out how much time your location allows for setup and breakdown and go over plans with your florist. How much time will he need? Some floral installations can take days, and if you won't have access to the venue until the morning of the wedding, that could present difficulties. If the florist is late breaking down, you could incur overtime fees on rentals.
Find out when a deposit is due. Thought deposit policies vary from florist to florist, you shouldn't have to put down more than 50 percent. Find out when the remainder is due (typically, two weeks before the wedding).
Ask about the cancellation policy and changes to the order.
Find out how many events the florist will be doing that weekend. If there are multiple weddings, find out who will be handling yours, since it may not be the person you've been dealing with.
Photographers Contract
In addition to the terms of the General Vendor Contract, your photographer's contract should specifically include the terms you agreed upon during your interview. It should also specify you "must be photographed" list. In addition, it should cover:
The color to black and white and candids to posed ratios.
The entire picture agreement, including the size and style of the album (s), how many pages will be in the album, the quality of the prints, any extra prints included in your package, and whether your names and wedding date will be printed on the cover.
When the proofs will be delivered to you, and the final delivery date of your album.
The Photography and Videography Contracts
Make sure these points are addressed in your contracts with photographers and videographers.
The date of the wedding, the arrival time, and the full address of the location.
The number of hours of photography or videography included in the fee.
The deposit amount and the date the balance is due; the cancellation policy; and rate for overtime.
The assistant (s), if there is one, and the hours he will work.
The fee, and the detailed list of everything it includes. There should be a price list for extra prints, albums, copies of the DVD, and the like.
For photography, the format or formats to be used. It should also include the percentage of black and white versus color.
What the photographer or videographer will bring or provide.
For videographer, the number of hours of raw footage he'll shoot and the length of the edited video.
What the photographer or videographer will wear to the wedding.
The backup plan in case the named photographer or videographer faills ill and can't make the wedding.
Wedding Gown Contract
Make sure you get a detailed receipt or other type of written contract stating the following things:
Price and payment schedule
Your wedding date
The manufacturer, style number, and size of the dress
Any changes to the design or color that have been discussed and approved
An estimate of how much the store is charging you for alterations or fittings ( on average, $50 to $100 but it can be much more). Ask to see the store's price chart.
Any promised discounts
The store's refund policy
Who's responsible for manufacturer, shipping, or alteration errors (the store should be)
The expected date of delivery
Your confirmation number
Delivery charges if you're having the store ship it (because you're getting married far away, for example)
Any other services the store has promised you, such as free steaming when the alterations are done ( a standard part of the purchase, but it can't hurt to get in writing.)
Before you leave the store, ask for a clean fabric sample from your dress. This will help you buy and dye (if necessary) your shoes, pick out the right color pearls or other jewelry, and get a matching veil and headpiece if you don't buy them at the store where you purchased your dress.
Caterers Proposal and Contract
After your first meeting with a caterer or catering manager, you should receive an initial proposal--you'll get the final proposal after the tasting. You want to receive the proposal early in the process so that you can budget appropriately. It should include:
The cost per person for the food, with detailed descriptions of what's included in each course.
Estimated alcohol charges (if caterer is providing alcohol).
Estimated charges for staffing (from a caterer of from a hotel if you're hiring extra staff.
Power charges (from a caterer for an off-site reception).
Any additional charges for an engineer (at a hotel or other on-site location) to fix anything that's gone wrong, from a blown fuse to a broken ice machine.
Bathroom staffing and charges for bathroom attendants.
Charges for coat check attendants.
Music Contract
No matter what type of band or deejay you choose, the following points should be addressed in the music contracts.
Date of event, address of location, arrival time, starting and ending time, number of hours the band will perform. (If they're available to stay longer if needed, write it into the contract).
Deposit amount and date the balance is due.
Frequency and length of breaks, and anything they'll provide during the breaks, such as recorded music.
Fee, detailing what it includes and what equipment they're supplying. Also list any equipment they've agreed to supply, such as chairs and amplifiers.
Overtime rate.
Cancellation policy
Attire of musicians or deejay
Names of the performers
For a band, the number of musicians and number of vocalists. Note the instruments they'll be playing.
If the Do Not Play list is of utmost importance to you, make it part of the contract.
Statement that they have valid liability insurance.
Priority Decisions 11
Priority 1
Wedding Planner
Officiate
Photographer
Caterer
Band/DJ
Priority 11
Videographer
Florist
Cake Maker
Hairstylist
Transportation
Priority 111
Invitation Designer
Ceremony Musicians
Lighting Consultant
Makeup Artist
Equipment Rental
First Priority
Planner. If you've decided to hire a planner, she'll recommend vendors directly.
American Society of Wedding Professionals 201-525-1777 201-472-3264
Association of Bridal Consultants 860-355-0464 www.bridalnet.com
Association of Certified Professional Wedding Consultants 408-223-5686
Association of Certified Wedding Consultants 800-520-2292
International Special Events Society (ISES) 800-688-ISES www.ISES.com
June Wedding, Inc. An Association for Event Professionals 702-474-9558 www.junewedding.com
National Bridal Service 804-355-0464
Officiate. If there's a special officiate you want for your wedding, this becomes your first call.
American Clergy Leadership Conference http://www.aclc.info
800-291-3793
Officiates (especially for interfaith ceremonies)
American Ethical Union (Ethical Culture) 212-873-6500 www.aeu.org
American Humanist Association 800-743-6646
Rabbinic Center for Research and Counseling (for a list of officiates nationwide willing to perform Interfaith ceremonies) 908-233-2288
Unitarian Universalist Association 617-742-2100 ext. 408 www.uua.org
Photographer. Many of the top photographers, particularly the independent photojournalist types, book only one wedding a day--or one wedding a weekend, for a destination wedding. With so few slots available, the good photographers book up very early, sometimes more than a year in advance.
International Freelance Photographers Association 910-945-9867
Professional Photographers of America Association 404-522-8600
Professional Women Photographers c/o Photographers Unlimited 212-726-8292
Wedding & Portrait Photographers International 310-451-0090 www.wppi-online.com
Caterer. They can only handle a limited number of events in a given weekend. The more you care about the food, the higher your caterer moves up your list.
The Catering Connection www.caterconnect.com
Food and Drink Network (hundreds of wine reviews) www.fdn.com
American Personal Chef Association 800-644-8389 http://www.personalchef.com
Vegetarian Societies http://www.vegan.org
American Dietetic Association http://www.eatright.org 1-800-877-1600
National Association of Catering Executives http://www.nace.net
International Association of Culinary Professionals http://www.iacp.com
Champagne Wines Information Bureau 212-682-6300
D. Sokolin Co. (For a wine and champagne catalog) 800- WINE-WIR
Leading Caterers of America 800-743-6660 www.leadingcaterers.com
National Association of Beverage Retailers 301-656-1494
North American Catering Executives 847-480-9080
Second Harvest National Food Bank Network 312-263-2303 www.secondharvest.org (for pickup of leftovers)
Wines and Spirits Wholesalers of America 202-371-9792
Reception band or deejay. Because they are so important to creating the mood of the event, they get snapped up early. The competition for bands comes not only from other weddings but also from fund-raisers and corporate parties.
American Musicians Union 201-568-8879
American Society of Jewish Music 212-874-4456
The College Music Society 800-729-0235 406-721-9616 www.music.org
Remember that Song 602-931-2835
The Wedding Band Center www.r8w.com
Wedding Music Information Source www.nuwebny.com/wedmusic
Amateur Chamber Music Players 212-645-7424
American Harp Society 213-463-0716
The Orchestra Leaders Association 800-359-0859 (CDs or tapes of original music for weddings)
American Disc Jockey Association (ADJA) 609-978-2180
Disc Jockey Referral Network, Inc. 847-506-9300 800-875-DJRN
www.800discjockey.com
www.djnet.com
Second Priority
Videographer. Some planners give the videographer higher priority, but I find there are enough good ones around that it doesn't hurt to wait a bit. Many of the video companies have a number of cameramen on call, so they can book several events in the same weekend.
Wedding & Event Videographers Association International 800-501-WEVA 941-923-5334 www.weva.com
Florist. A large florist can handle several events in a weekend. If you're booking eight or nine months in advance, you should be able to get your choice of florists.
American Institute of Floral Designers 410-752-3318
Society of American Florists 800-336-4743 703-836-8700 www.safnow.org
Cake maker. Should you want to hire a specialty cake designer, get on his schedule. The top ones limit the number of cakes they make in a week, and they won't bake ahead and freeze cakes. Commercial backers do bake ahead, allowing them to turn out more cakes in a weekend; you can book them later in the process.
Retailers Bakery Association http://www.rbanet.com 1-800-658-0924
International Cake Exploration Societe http://www.ices.org
Hairstylist. The most talented stylists book up early, and those who come to you can generally handle only one wedding a day.
National Association of Barber Boards of America http://www.nationalbarberboards.com
Hair International/Associated Master Barbers and Beauticians of America 717-838-0795
Transportation. The availability of limos, shuttles, and other vehicles depends on the locale and the season. If it's spring (prom season), book your limo earlier.
Carey International Limousine Service 800-336-4646
National Limousine Association 800-NLA-7007
Third Priority
Invitation designer. If you're having invitation custom designed, you want to start the process about four months before the wedding.
Crane & Company 800-572-0024 (customer service) 800-472-7263 (for a dealer near you who carries Crane products)
Evangel Christian Wedding Invitations 800-342-4227 812-623-2509
Heart Thoughts 800-648-5781
Invitations, Etc. 800-709-7979
Invitation Hotline 800-800-4355 732-536-9115
Precious Collection 800-537-5222
Reaves Engraving 910-369-2260
Ceremony musicians. There's no shortage of talented classical musicians, so you can usually wait until a few months before the wedding to put down your deposit.
American Musicians Union 201-568-8879
American Society of Jewish Music 212-874-4456
The College Music Society 800-729-0235 406-721-9616 www.music.org
Remember that Song 602-931-2835
Amateur Chamber Music Players 212-645-7424
American Harp Society 213-463-0716
The Orchestra Leaders Association 800-359-0859 (CDs or tapes of original music for weddings)
American Guild of Organists 212-870-2310 800-AGO-5115 www.agohq.org
Lighting company. They set up ahead of time and can handle multiple events in a day.
Makeup artist. Most brides want a classic look for their wedding---which the average makeup artist can handle. There are many deft makeup artists, so unless you're attached to a particular person, you should be able to find one a few months before your wedding.
Contract Points
Once you've found your makeup artist, negotiate a rate and get it in writing--even if you're working with someone who doesn't usually draw up a contract. The contract should cover the date, arrival time, number of hours, price, location, and any extra expenses (for example, parking, products, etc.) On average, makeup artists (and hairstylists) usually take about forty-five minutes to work their magic, which doesn't include time to travel and set up their tools.
Rentals such as tents, chairs, china. Barring a huge convention in the area, you shouldn't have a problem reserving rentals.
Your contract with a rental company should cover the following points:
When the deposit is due and how much is required. One third to one half down is common.
When and where the goods will be delivered to the site. Make sure this corresponds with the window of time during which you have access to the site. Be specific about where the merchandise will be delivered and whether it will be unpacked and set up. Some companies charge different fees depending on the level of service involved in the delivery.
When the rentals will be picked up. Again, make sure the timing agrees with your contract at the site.
How the rentals should be prepared for pickup. Many companies want the dishes, glassware, and flatware washed and repacked in boxes and the linens shaken out and folded into one pile.
Whether there is a delivery or pickup fee.
What kind of insurance they carry.
What will be charged if any items are lost or damaged?
Detailed descriptions and numbers of every item you're renting.
Whether any overtime or extra charges apply to your proposed rental time frame. You may be paying extra if you want rentals delivered a day or two early or if you request a Sunday (instead of a Monday) pickup. Some of these extra charges are negotiable, especially if you're placing a large order.
The American Rental Association 309-764-2475 800-334-2177
Industrial Fabrics Association International (IFAI) Tent Rental Division 612-222-2508 800-225-4324
How to Complain
Save all contracts, sales receipts, canceled checks, owners manuals and warranty documents. To avoid problems, read and follow product and service instructions. The way to use or take care of a product might affect your warranty rights.
The first step in resolving a consumer problem is usually to contact the business that sold you the item or performed the service. If you wish to go directly to the headquarters of the company or the manufacturer, ask if they have a consumer affairs office and, if so, report the problem directly to them. Otherwise, communicate with a manager or the president of the business.
These reference books at your public library also have helpful information:
The Standard & Poor’s Register of Corporations, Directors and Executives
Trade Names Directory
Standard Directory of Advertisers
Dunn &Bradstreet Directory
Thomas Register of American Manufacturers
Keep in mind the name of the manufacturer or parent company is often different than the brand name. You may also be able to get a corporation’s address from the Attorney General’s office in the state where the company is incorporated.
Call for Action Inc. is a non-profit network of consumer hotlines that educate and assist consumers with consumer problems. Listed below are hotlines in major markets staffed with trained volunteers who offer advice and mediate complaints at no cost to consumers. Consumers in locations not listed should call the Network Hotline at 301-657-7490
WTAJ-TV
Altoona, PA
814-944-9336
WXIA-TV
Atlanta, GA
678-422-8466
WBZ Radio
Boston, MA
617-787-7070
WIVB-TV
Buffalo, NY
716-879-4900
WJW-TV
Cleveland, OH
216-578-0700
KKTV-TV
Colorado Springs, CO
719-457-8211
WXYZ-TV & WJR Radio
Detroit, MI
248-8273362
WINK-TV
Fort Myers, FL
941-334-4357
WFMY-TV
Greensboro, NC
336-680-1000
KCTV-5
Kansas City, MO
913-831-1919
WTMJ-TV
Milwaukee, WI
414-967-5495
WABC Radio
New York, NY
212-268-5626
KPNX-TV & KNAZ-TV
Phoenix/Flagstaff, AZ
1-866-260-1212 (toll free)
WTAE-TV
Pittsburgh, PA
412-333-4444
KTVI-TV, St. Louis, MO
636-282-2222
1-800-782-2222 (Illinois only)
KTVX-TV
Salt Lake City, UT
1-877-908-0444 (toll free)
WTOL-TV
Toledo, OH
419-255-2255
WTOP AM-FM
Washington, DC
301-652-4357
Small Claims Court
Small claims courts resolve disputes involving claims for small amounts of money. While the maximum amounts that can be claimed or awarded differ from state to state, court procedures generally are simple, inexpensive, quick and informal. Court fees are minimal, and you often get your filing fee back if you win your case. Typically, you will not need a lawyer, and some states do not permit them.
If you live in a state that allows lawyers and if the party you are suing brings one, do not be intimidated. Most judges make allowances for consumers who appear without lawyers. Even though the court is informal, the judge’s decision is binding and must be followed.
If you file a case and win, the losing party may give you what the court says you are owed without further action on your part. But some losers refuse to follow the court’s directions. When this happens, you can go back to court and ask for the order to be enforced. Depending on local laws, the court might order property to be taken by law enforcement officials and sold. You will get the money from a bank account or business cash register. If the person who owes the money receives a salary, the court might order an employer to garnish (deduct money from) each paycheck and give it to you.
Check your local telephone book under the municipal, county or state government headings for small claims court offices. Ask the clerk how to use the small claims court. Before taking your own case to court:
Request educational material to help you prepare your presentation.
Observe a small claims court session.
Legal Information and Help
If you need an attorney to advise or represent you, ask friends and family for recommendations. You can also contact the Lawyer Referral Service of your state, county, or city bar association listed in the telephone directory.
Websites such as www.abalawinfo.org (American Bar Association), www.uslaw.com, www.thelaw.com, www.freeadvice.com, www.thelawyerpages.com, and nolo.com may help you with answers to general legal questions. For information on state-specific legal questions, try the website of the National Administrators (www.nacaanet.org).
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